Lessons 2&3

Lesson #2
I am lazy.

Lesson #3
The Three Pillars of Korean Society

1) Spicy food
The first one I lucked out on. Or perhaps Korea lucked out on me with. I love spicy food. On top of that, I’m a rather un-picky eater. I will eat anything (except for bugs- dead or alive). This has been an enormous aid to me here. I have delighted many of the other teachers at lunch by happily devouring (almost) everything I’m served at lunch, while showing perfect grace with my chopsticks.

2) Soju
Korean beverage of choice. A cross between a mild vodka and Japanese sake. It’s actually quite tolerable to take shots of. Which is good, because that is the preferable method of drinking it. Aptly named – the “one shot.” Other acceptable methods include pouring it into your beer, sipping it (mostly for women and done discreetly), or plunking the shot of it into your beer and downing it like a one shot- this time it’s a “bomb.” Like a sake bomb! However, instead of sitting at a dim lit sushi restaurant with a group of your loud friends, you’re sitting cross-legged on a cushion with a table of loud Korean men.

3) Singing
Karaoke, or noreh-bahng in Korean, is the ultimate Korean past-time. I thought I’d made it an entire year without having to sing at a faculty function until a few weeks ago when they began an impromptu singing session at a restaurant. After an hour or two of revelry at the school dinner, a make-shift microphone was made out of a cup and spoon, and one of the teachers who was soon to be married rose to sing and happily burst into song. (That’s the thing that’s so intimidating about singing with Koreans. They belt it out like they’re on American idol). Soon they were urging me to get up and sing a song. I was terrified. Not only were we in a restaurant, but there was no music. A friendly, but pressing teacher (who doesn’t speak English), offered to sing a song with me, but the only song he suggested was “Bridge Over Troubled Water.” After 10 minutes of cajoling and chanting, and pleas from my co-teacher (why don’t you get up there and sing yourself?!), they gave up. On the way home my co-teacher so comfortingly told me that I should have sang a song because it is a very important part of Korean culture. (Once again, I didn’t see you up there busting out a cappella.

Last Thursday was another special teacher outing. Our school won a cash prize for earning the title of Top School in our district and the principal decided to use some of it for a day trip. This time, I was warned a day in advance that I would need to sing. I settled it with myself that I would sing a Christmas carol. 'Tis the season and everyone is allowed some leeway in terms of musical ability with Christmas carols. All day I wondered when they would decide to sing. All buses are equipped with karaoke here, so I wasn’t safe anywhere. But the trip down to the coast came and went. Seafood feast came and went. Trip to migratory bird sanctuary came and went. I thought I was in the clear. We were on our way home and I hadn’t yet had to sing. But, I knew that when a lively male teacher who’d been up and down the aisle with bottle after bottle of soju started digging around in the overhead cubbies that I wasn’t off the hook. I silently prayed that he wouldn’t be able to find the microphone or the book of songs. He found them both. The bus was transformed into a karaoke room. I panicked and chose a Britney Spears song and waited for it to come up in the queue. And so, clutching the back of a seat at the front of the bus with one hand, and a microphone with the other, I sang.